I Need My Girl
by oatsandroses
Summary: Their relationship was toxic for awhile, but after an incident, Bonnie decided to turn her life around but Stefan took a little more time to change. He leans on her for support, for love, through his anger and pain and she's glad to be there for him. But he's hiding a secret and once that secret comes to light, it's like the world turned upside down... [STEFONNIE]
1. Prologue

**Summary extended: They were all each other needed. Their relationship was toxic for awhile, but after an incident, Bonnie decided to turn her life around but Stefan took a little more time to change. He leans on her for support, for love, through his anger and pain and she's glad to be there for him. But he's hiding a secret and once that secret comes to light, it's like the world turned upside down and they have to fight harder than ever leading him to do whatever it takes to get her back.**

* * *

 _Prologue_

Bonnie blinked her eyes open waking up seeing nothing but snow and a large garbage ben. She coughed getting up pushing herself up with her hands slowly then leaned her back against the bricked wall. Her body shook as she reached in her pocket pulling out a box of cigarettes and pulled her last one out its holder along with a lighter. By the time she stood up from the soft, cold ground, it was just a bud and she headed south stuffing her hands in her brown coat pocket.

She pressed the buzzer longley and repeatedly until his demanding voice was heard through the speaker.

"What?"

"Let me in. It's fucking cold out here." She bounced on her toes looking around.

"Why are you up so early, it's like four AM."

She growled. "Open the door, Stefan!"

She yanked on the door open hearing it buzz, then quickly headed up three flights of stairs then passed five doors before she knocked on his. She waited a second before it opened coming face with his shirtless state and boxers riding low on his waist. The V of waistline hips on full view. She walked inside removing her jacket then the rest of her clothes.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm freezing." She said pulling down her jeans before walking over to his bed.

"Shouldn't you be putting on more clothes then?"

"Just fuck off."

He sighed watching her wrap herself in his blanket then walked over to her lifting up the sheets so he could lay beside her. "Let me hold you." He took her body in his arms and moved his hand down her back kissing the top of her head. "Where were you last night?" His hand worked a little faster.

"At a friend's."

"She didn't have any heat? You're like ice sickle." He shivered himself.

She didn't respond, just held him tight with her eyes closed. "Who did you sleep with last night?"

"W- no one."

"Then who's panties do I feel under my foot?" Pause. "I'm tired of you cheating on me, Stefan."

"I swear I didn't sleep with anyone last night. I fucking swear."

"Whatever, I don't care. I'm leaving you soon anyway. I'm gonna find a guy who actually appreciates me."

A horrible picture entered his mind and he sighed pulling her in closer.

* * *

She smiled holding the blanket around her closed with her hand as he sat in front of her. He made her breakfast and was feeding it to her as they talked. Stefan looked up at her after stabbing two slices of pancake with his fork. He saw her smile and he smiled back then sat the fork down so he could touch the side of her face.

"You're so beautiful."

She smiled then closed her eyes as he met their lips. Her hand moved to the back of his neck as she kissed him back. He pulled away staying close looking into her eyes.

"I love you." He reminded.

"I love you too."

"Yeah?"

She nodded and he smiled then met their lips again before he kissed the side of her neck twice.

"I'm full." Bonnie told him then chuckled as he ate the two slices on the fork before getting up walking into the kitchen.

"I was uh thinking that we spend the day together. I don't have work today and it's been awhile, you know?"

She nodded smiling a little. "Yeah, that sounds great."

"Good." He smiled over at her as he washed off the dish.

She kept her eyes on him as he finished washing the dish and dried his hands then walked over to her still dressed in those low riding boxers. He stood in front of her and she looked up at him placing her hands on his hips. His eyebrow raised.

"Come here," she scooted back on the bed as he crawled above her. "You know what else has been awhile?" She kissed him feeling his hand slide up her stomach.

"When are we having babies?"

"You want children?"

"With you." He kissed down her neck squeezing her breasts as his lips traveled down.

Bonnie closed her eyes enjoying the feel and sucked in a loud breath feeling his hand slide in her panties moving in a circular motion. She got rid of her bra herself and tossed it to the side as he worked on sliding the lace down her legs. His boxers were off in the next second and their lips fused as he slid inside her.

Her leg wrapped around his waist moving her lips away from his so she could breathe. His mouth moved to her cheek kissing her multiple times before looking into her eyes.

His hand moved to the side of her face as he stared at her beauty and their eyes never parted.

 **;;;;**

Bonnie smiled as he struggled with the lighter and cheered a little once he finally got a lasting flame. "This is going to be the best weed ever since it took so damn long."

She chuckled watching him inhale then let it out slowly before handing her the blunt.

"I was right." He said watching her get a hit as well.

Bonnie coughed a little making him laugh before taking it from her fingers rolling on his back. "It's weird to think that- that we will die. You know?"

"I guess."

He watched the smoke in the air until it faded. "Like all we are is just vessels roaming the world. Fucking, laughing, fighting, eating. Like what's our purpose as humans?"

She rolled on top of him and sucked in as he blew out the smoke leading it between her lips. "Our purpose is to live until we die. And to not give up on it."

"On what?"

"Life and everything that comes with it. Life's married to good times but has a baby mama named "bad times" who pops up every now and then for child support." He chuckled and closed his eyes as she kissed him once before resting her head on his chest. "Who did you fuck last night?"

"I swear to you, no one. Wouldn't she still would've been here when you came over? No one was here besides me and you. I'm not cheating on you again." She sat up and looked into his eyes. "I swear."

She stayed looking then nodded choosing to believe him. "Can we go out, please?"

"It's like a blizzard out there. You were just freezing like two hours ago."

"I'll just go by myself,"

He grabbed her waist, "Wait, fine, alright. Just give me a second."

She smiled and kissed him biting down on his lower lip before getting up looking into his closet for some clothes. She pulled one of his sweaters down her head then screamed a little then laughed as Stefan's hands suddenly wrapped around her as he growled in her ear taking her back over to the bed.

"I was going to wear that."

"We can wear it together."

He lifted his right brow then lifted the shirt from her skin and placing his head under it to suck and squeezing on her breasts. She enjoyed it for awhile before she started to push him out.

"Stefan, you're distracting me, I want to go. Stop, you're- distracting…me." She forcefully lifted her leg that was between his and heard him painfully groan as his head fell against her flesh before slowly sliding down her body. "Where is she?"

He took deep breaths holding his balls. "Baby-"

"Where the fuck is she?!"

"I didn't sleep with her, it was just a party, we were smokin' and havin' fun, I swear-" his head was forced to the left as she slapped him.

"She's in the closet, isn't she."

When he didn't respond she knew she was right so she heads over there again and pushed some clothes to the side. Bonnie rolled her eyes seeing her asleep then grabbed her arms forcing her up but gasped when she was limp.

"Holy fuck," she covered her mouth and stepped back. "Stefan, she's fucking dead."

"What?" He crawled over and slipped twice over nothing before he placed his head over her heart. "No, I- I can hear her heart. It's faint. Run a cold bath."

Bonnie quickly ran over to his tub and turned on the cold water as Stefan lifted her and dumped her inside. She sat beside her smacking her face a little asking her to wake up as the water filled and tears started coming down her eyes.

Was this what she's going to look like in a year? Soaked in Stefan's tub because she overdosed and is barely hanging on to life?

She said that the purpose of being a human was to just live and not give up, but she's starting to wonder if the lifestyle she's living is just another way of giving up. It's killing her slowly but quickly all at the same time.

She watched Stefan give the poor girl CPR, but she wasn't sure if he was doing it right or not. She crawled back until her back hit the wall and that's where she stayed throughout it all.


	2. Chapter 1

Stefan groaned feeling the side of him getting hit with a foot repeatedly until he made some sort of movement. His eyes blinked open coming to realize that he was lying on the floor then sat up some more seeing his Bonnie dump her keys on the table then remove the large bag from over her shoulder.

"I was just thinking about you, baby."

She chuckled. "Passed out on the floor? Yeah right."

He slowly rose to his feet and in that same speed walked over to her hugging her from behind. She protested against it because of his smell, but stopped when she realized that he wouldn't let her go.

"I love you, you know that?"

"Yeah."

"I can't live without you. Don't leave me cause then I'll die but that will be OK because I'll find you and stay with you forever as a ghost." She rolled her eyes but smiled. "How was work?"

"Pretty good actually. I got paid."

"Can I borrow fifty bucks?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"You know why. You'll spend it on drugs and you said that you would stop after this week."

"I can't go out with a bang?"

"No, Stef—"

"Come on, baby. Just me and you having one last good time together like we used to."

"I've been clean for almost a year."

"Almost," he chuckled. "Let's start together, it'll be easier that way, we can help each other out. Call out of work for the weekend, we'll party tonight and tomorrow and stop on the sabbath."

She couldn't stop her laugh. "Since she do you call it the 'sabbath'?"

"Since we're getting clean. Jesus will be on our side."

She chuckled then her face went serious. "I don't know, Stefan."

"Baby, come on. Please. Do this for me, for us. All I need is two fifty."

"Two fifty?" Her eyes went wide. "That'll leave us with one hundred for two weeks."

"The fridge is stocked and I can get us a few extra bucks if we need it. Come on,"

She looked into his eyes as he held out his hand then let out a breath before reaching for her satchel to get her wallet then handed him the money. He kissed her then told her that he'll be back in an hour before leaving her in their apartment.

 **;;;**

She watched him split in threes right in front of her eyes then chuckled before closing her eyes moving her head back. "Ow," she rubbed her head as it hit the wall.

Stefan laughed then crawled up to her kissing her head repeatedly. "You're bleeding."

"No I'm not."

"Then what's all this red?"

"I dyed my hair red like last month, asshat."

"Oh."

She frowned. "Do you like it? I'll cry if you don't."

He shushed her when she started pouting and tearing up and held her close, "I love it, baby, I promise. I love it so much, you look so beautiful, so beautiful."

"You promise?" She sniffed in.

"I promise, I love it."

He moved to kiss her then wiped away her tears before kissing her again moving her to her back sliding his hands up her shirt.

* * *

He rested his head on her stomach as they both breathed deeply. He caught his breath then looked up her naked body smiling seeing that she was still struggling. He started with kisses moving up then licked across her nipples gaining a moan. He kissed her chin and she smiled. Stefan met their lips and they started kissing deeply and intensely. He rocked his body into her but wouldn't go as far as removing his jeans. This wasn't about sex right now, just kissing, but making out with Bonnie never failed to put him in the mood. She still felt pleasure from him making her almost yank out the hair on his head. She wanted him, but this wasn't about sex right now.

His body slowed as their lips followed and soon his hips no longer moved at all, but their lips continued to do so. She needed to breathe, but Stefan kept kissing her mouth until he was ready to pull away and when he was, his head moved to the side of her neck and he felt her pounding heart on the side of his face. He moved off her to grab his shirt off the ground and help her get dressed in it. It was inside out, but they didn't mind.

He then moved over to the dresser pulling out a blunt, lit it, and walked back over to their bed in the middle of the room. He sat against the headboard then decided on laying next to her. He released the smoke on his mouth before pulling her on top of him.

He kissed her. "I'll never find a lover like you."

"Then why did you do it," she referred to the cheating.

He chuckled then held the paper up to his mouth. "Because like you said. I know you'll leave me and find a guy who can love you better than I can. Even though I knew I would fail, I tried. You won't be around long, but. The thought of that makes me do very dark things." He handed it to her.

"Do you love me?"

"What the hell, of course I do,"

"Then you'll stop thinking that bullshit. No matter how many times I want to leave your ass, I don't think I can. And I hate it, honestly, I really do. I would've been gone a long time ago, but I'm here." She took a hit. "But I love you, Stefan. Nothing can or ever will change that."

He watched her eyes then started to get up when she did. His body rocked as she started jumping beside him on the bed. The people downstairs would surely complain, but he didn't stop her. He looked up at her and smiled not remembering a time when he's even her this free. All he wants is for her to be happy and for her to never stop loving him. She told him that she wouldn't, but he couldn't be so sure.

He hit her legs lightly causing her to stop jumping and straddle his lap. He kissed her twice before pulling her in a hug. She smiled then hugged him back tightly then turned her head biting his neck.

"Ow! Babe,"

"It didn't hurt that bad."

"Oh yeah?"

She screamed as he bit her and slapped his arm. "You actually have fangs you…fucking guy."

"You're the one with teeth like a werewolf."

She rolled her eyes then pulled away from the hug. Stefan narrowed his eyes at her as she looked at him like she's looking at a monster then backs her head away.

"Wh- what's wrong with your face?"

"What?"

"Under your eyes. I'm barely high, I'm not imagining it."

Stefan turned his face away. "Are you sure you're not high? You just—"

"Stefan, what aren't you telling me?" She grabbed his face in her hands forcing him to look at her then narrowed her eyes when his face was back to normal. "I swore I just. Your face, there was." She let out a breath shaking her head a little.

"Are you hungry, I'll fix you something."

"No I just need some sleep. Lay with me?"

He nodded and watched her get comfortable on the bed before getting behind her with his arm around her waist.

Shortly, he heard her low snores then kissed her cheek before holding her tighter and closer. He couldn't believe that he let himself become undone in front of her and he blames it on the high, but still, he could've had control. Letting out a small breath, he closes his eyes and dreams of her.

 **;;;**

They looked at each other wide eyed as Bonnie's hands were on the wheel. She wanted to go for a drive after a long night of "partying", but ended up driving the car into someone's garden. She got out and apologized to the vines and plants having Stefan laugh then carry her back in before he attempted his turn to drive them back home. Her hand stretched out turning up the radio and started to dance and sing along to the tune playing. She barely knew the words, but that didn't stop her from singing with all that she had.

Stefan only shook his head, but looked over at her and smiled. She's so lovely.

* * *

Her nails race up his back as he pounds into her and she comes in a silent scream silencing the room for the first time in five minutes.

Heavy breaths shortly fill the room then she moans as he starts a slower movement now kissing her at about the same pace.

"I fuckin' love you. So fucking much." He tells her against her lips then kisses her some more before stiffening filling her up.

He pulls out then lays beside her breathing deeply as well then looks over at her. "You always look so sexy after,"

She smiles and looks over at him. "What about before and during?"

"Before, you look hella cute. That's why I kiss you a lot and touch you all over. During, all I know is your eyes and the passion and the lust and the fire in them and I can barely tear my eyes away from yours."

"You always know what to say. That's what I love and hate about you. Always so good words."

"Can I get a kiss?"

She moved to kiss him and ran her hand up his bare chest circling his neck. "I love you so fucking much too." She smiles when he does and kisses him again.

"I'll be a better man for you, I promise. I'll never cheat on you ever again, I'll try my hardest to never hurt you, I'll be there for you. I'll marry you."

"Marry me?"

"Yes. One day that's gonna be soon." He kissed her head. "Well have a wedding and—"

Knocks on the door interrupted and made them still and Stefan stood up to slip on his pants once those knocks turned into banging and Bonnie started jumping in his arms. As he reached for the door, the banging stopped so he decided to let it go for now.

He turns back to Bonnie and sees her now dressed in his shirt. "Let's go for a walk, baby."

"Okay,"

She got up and walked to the closet pulling down a sweater and dark jeans from its hanger. She goes with boots since it's Fall and grabs a leather jacket just for safety.

Stefan watched her undress and dress before he get ready himself basically putting on a manlier version of what his girlfriend has on. He fit his fingers in the spaces between hers after she locked their apartment door and they started on their walk.

She would smile whenever he would kiss her head or hug her when they're waiting for that red hand to turn into a white man walking.

"Tell me your deepest secret."

"I don't think I have one." He shrugged. "You know probably all there is to know about me."

"Really?"

"We've been together for four years,"

"Yeah, but still,"

"Tell me yours."

"Uh, I still have sex dreams about Leo D."

"I thought you said those stopped?"

"I lied." She chuckled as he shook his head.

"I'm not good enough for you, baby?"

"We both know that you're more than good enough for me."

He kissed her backing her against the nearest wall wrapping his arms around her. "You're my number one."

"I better be."

He chuckled then they kissed again for a few seconds before pulling away.

"Well look who it is." A voice was heard gaining the couple's attention.

They turned and as Bonnie's face grew confused, Stefan's grew worry.

* * *

 **A/N: So who do you think this mystery person is? Tell me what you think so far in the reviews!**


	3. Chapter 2

Stefan let out a breath watching her sleep soundly beside him and moved his hand down her hair a few times.

Getting clean was harder than he thought, but he was so glad that Bonnie was with him because she always knew what to do. He wouldn't know what he would do without

"Baby?" He lightly shook her. "Wake up," he did so again.

"Hmm?"

"We have to go."

"Where?"

"Anywhere but here. Someplace far."

"Why?"

"You just have to trust me."

She opened her eyes frowning at his expression then sat up a little. "Stef, we have no money. Well not enough to go anywhere far. Can it wait two weeks?"

He thought. "I don't know."

"Does it have to do with that guy we saw?" When he didn't answer, she continued. "Who was that?"

"It doesn't matter,"

"It does. It matters to me."

He let out a sigh then avoided her eyes. "He's my brother."

Her eyes went wide, "Brother? You never told me you had a brother?"

"I never wanted you to know. He's bad news, Bonnie. I never wanted to be found."

She frowned and held him close kissing the side of his head. "Okay. But we have to wait or else we'll be living on the street. I can call my cousin and maybe she'll let us stay with her for a month while we find something."

He nodded then held her tighter. "I love you. Don't leave me, please don't leave me."

"I won't. I promise."

He let out a breath then pulled away to kiss her sweetly. "When do you have to go to work?"

"In about two hours. Come visit me?"

He nods then kisses her again before she gets up to go take a shower. Once he heard the water run, Stefan gets out of bed heading towards the closet and digs in the duffle bag he keeps hidden in the corner of the room. He takes out the blood bag and tears it open before drinking its content in all but five seconds. He repeats three more times wanting to be strong when he faces his brother later today.

"Babe?"

"Yeah?"

"Come shower with me?"

"I'll be there in a second," he decided to drink another then stuffs the empty bags back into the duffle before stripping heading into the bathroom.

 **;;;;**

Stefan let out a breath before sitting next to his brother asking for a beer.

"Let me guess. Bonnie has no idea."

"How do you know her name?"

"I'm your big brother, Stef. It's my job to know these things."

"Well stop. Stop being my brother, I don't need you."

He chuckled. "Oh you need me, Stefan. Who else is going to be there for you once she runs away once the beans spill? Just like Hanna and Michelle."

"Bonnie's different."

"And how is that?"

"She promised me."

Damon sighed running his hands down his face. "Stefan. You can sometimes act like a three year old. She promised you? That's how you know she won't leave you because she promised you?"

"You don't know her like I do. I've been a shitty person and she deals with me. I did shitty things, she still loves me."

"Doing shitty things and being a monster are two completely different things. You can't expect to hide this from her forever."

"Why are you here? Why ruin my life?"

"I'm not ruining anything, I'm helping. The sooner you tell her, the sooner your pain goes away. We can be brothers again, on the road, just like old times."

He chuckled then nodded in realization. "So that's why you're back. You're lonely."

"I do not get lonely."

"Okay, sure."

"I can't be a good brother and look out for you? She's going to break up with you, Stefan and something tells me that you're not going to take this lightly since you claim that she's different. You'll kill yourself."

* * *

Bonnie looked over hearing the bells to the front door jingle then smiled seeing that it was Stefan who walked through. She moved away from behind the counter and hugged him before kissing him a few times.

"I missed you."

"I missed you too." He kissed her then hugged her. "You'll never leave me right? You promised,"

"I will always be there for you, babe. You can tell me anything." She hugged him tighter knowing that he was in need of the comfort.

She's noticed that he has trust issues, meaning that she has to swear and promise on a lot of things and lately it's been that and wouldn't leave him. She knew that whatever he needed to tell her was serious and she hoped that she could keep the promises she made. If she didn't, she knew that he wouldn't take it lightly, he would respect her and leave her alone, but she was terrified of what he would do to himself.

Stefan pulled away grabbing her face in his hands. "I need to tell you something, baby."

She frowned seeing the look in his eyes. "Are _you_ leaving?"

"No, I would never leave you here. I never want you to think that or say that again. You're with me always."

"Then what is it?"

"We'll talk tonight. I'll make your favorite and we'll talk. Okay?" She nodded and he moved down to kiss her longingly. "I love you."

"I love you too."

They kissed again before he walked out causing her to sigh.

 **;;;;**

Stefan sat the lasagna on the table and cut her a big slice then kissed her head. Bonnie smiled and watched as he sat in front of her and grabbed her left hand with his. He moved his thumb across the back of her hand as she started eating with her right. She told him that she had a long day at the bookstore so he knew that she was hungry and decided to wait until she was finished before he told her the news.

"Oh, babe, I talked to Lynn and she said that we can stay with her for awhile. If you still want to leave."

"I want to."

She frowned. "Then why don't you sound like it?" She didn't want to rush him into telling her whatever he had to tell her so she's been patient but hoped that this would lead to exactly that.

"Bonnie, I… I'm…I'm not fertile."

She blinked a few times. "What?"

"I know I said that I wanted to have babies with you, but the truth is that I can't. I'm unable to."

"O-oh. I uh, …Well, there's always adoption, right? I mean that is if we really want kids. I mean, they're a huge responsibility and—"

"Wait, that's not exactly what I wanted to say." She watched him stand and move the seat closer to hers then sat back down. He looked at her hands before grabbing them in his. "You asked for my darkest secret and I lied to you when I said I didn't have one."

"Okay," she turned more towards him.

"Baby, I love you so much. More than anything in this entire world and I- I will never hurt you and I need you to know that."

"I know that," she kissed him. "What is it, babe?"

"Bonnie, I. I'm a vampire." He closed his eyes waiting for her scream or for her to move her hands out of his hold but she does none of that. He opens his eyes and sees her looking at him.

"Are you okay? Do you have a fever or did you smoke something?"

"Bonnie you have to believe me. I'm a vampire, I drink blood for fuck sake." He regretted his words as he watched her face change.

"I don't know what to say. Maybe you need a nap or something."

"Bonnie-" he sighed looking down at his lap. He didn't want to do this but this would be the only eat that she would believe him.

She gasped lowly seeing his face change before her eyes. The veins under his eyes like she remembers seeing, his eyes redden and her eyes grow wide once his fangs lengthen. Sitting right in front of her was a vampire. She's dating a vampire. A…vampire.

Stefan quickly catches her as she faints and he decides to move her to the bed.

* * *

Bonnie blinks her eyes awake coming face with him then gasps moving backward. His heart broke into a thousand pieces and she saw it.

"I'm sorry,"

"You're leaving me?" He asked as his eyes swelled with tears.

"No. I'm sorry I backed away, I didn't mean to."

"You're not leaving me?"

She shook her head letting a tear slip. "I promised."

He let out a breath then moved her hug her tightly kissing her head. "I love you."

"I love you too."

He pulled away then met their lips three times. "You're all I need. I can understand if you're scared, but I will never do anything to hurt you physically. You're my number one."

She nodded then kissed him. "Can you tell me the story? Of how it all happened?"

He sucked in a breath before letting it out. "Anything for you."

She smiled then crossed her legs.

* * *

Bonnie listened closely as he told her the tale. He was twenty when he found out that he had colon cancer and it was getting worse since the medicine he needed was expensive and he couldn't afford it all the time. His brother would help him out whenever he could because though they don't like to admit it, at the time they couldn't live without each other. Damon needed his brother, just as Stefan needed him.

He doesn't know how Damon became a vampire, but one night, he tricked him into drinking some of his blood saying that a witch made a mixture that will cure him. He trusted his brother so he drank and before he knew it, a pillow was over his face and he was struggling for his life to breathe. When he woke up, he was confused on how he was still alive, he remembers dying and was wondering if he was in some part of purgatory.

"Wait, so he killed you?" Bonnie asked intrigued.

Stefan nodded and continued. "So then I see him walk back in the room with a girl. I'm wondering what the hell is going on and he tells me that I'll be cured if I drink this girl's blood. I refuse because I was so confused, I had no idea what was happening, what I was, how I was still alive. Then I feel my fangs lengthen once he turns her and I see the blood on her neck and he pushes me towards her and something snaps within me then I drink her blood. Almost all of it."

Bonnie's mouth opens slightly just as her eyes widen. He went on to tell her about how he became a monster and since Damon didn't want to deal with him, he left him all alone after he turned him into a monster. It did nothing but make it worse no matter how hard he tried to get better, it just kept getting worse.

He hated Damon for leaving, for giving up on him and if it wasn't for this little girl, he would still be that ripper.

"Little girl?"

"Her name was Delilah. I never fed on children, not ever. She saw me feeding and I had no idea that she was behind me. When I turn I freeze. Vampires were not welcome and I have lived well in the shadows so I just knew she would scream and expose me. When she doesn't, I ask why she isn't scared or screaming and by this time my face is back to normal and I wipe away the blood, but there's still some left. She tells me to come closer and I do so intrigued by this little, brave girl and she kisses my cheek." He paused thinking back. "She kisses my cheek and tells me that I don't have to be bad. That if I was good then she wouldn't tell on me," he chuckled. "Then she hugged me and I just hold her back and something switches within me and I get better. I keep watch over her like she was my own child, sometimes making myself known and others just from afar. She grew up to be an amazing and beautiful woman and married a great man and had children and because I knew that she was alright, that's when I decided to move."

He goes on to say how he ran into Damon who was glad that he changed his ways, and they stayed together for a decade staying in different places, meeting other vampires and people and he thought that it was going to be this way forever, but then he realized that his brother was more of a monster than he led on.

He didn't care who he drank from, who he hurt, what laws he broke. Stefan tried to ignore his brothers ways, but he snapped when he killed a pregnant woman for no reason. Luckily, the baby was saved, but Stefan couldn't take anymore. He left without a word or trace and moved to New York knowing that this would be the last place that his brother would look for him.

To stop the cravings and to numb his pain of realizing what his brother was, he started doing drugs to get away and ignore everything. Then he met Bonnie fifteen years later thanks to a mutual friend. He's always found her attractive, but never wanted to go there with a girl again because every time he found himself in a relationship with a human, it always ended with them running away.

"But you couldn't resist me," she teases smiling.

"You're right, I couldn't." He kissed her. "And I'm glad that I couldn't because you're the best thing that has ever happened to me. I love you so much."

"I love you more."

They shared a few kisses before laying down and they held each other in their arms. He kissed her head a few times then closed his eyes getting some rest for the remainder of the night.

 **;;;;**

Stefan reached out his hand then sat up quickly when he didn't feel her beside him. "Bonnie?" He got out of bed and got up searching and calling for her.

Did she leave him? Did she just runaway because she got scared? Was it happening all over again?

"Bonnie?!" His breath got heavy and his head snapped to the door hearing it open then let out a breath when she walked inside.

"What's wrong?" She asked as he hugged her close. She kissed the side of his head.

"I thought you left me."

She frowned then sat her bag down to wrap her arms around him. "I'm here to stay. Unless you do something to really piss me off."

He chuckled letting out breath through his mouth. "I'm sorry I thought that."

"It's OK, Stefan. Just don't think it again."

He nodded pulling away before he kissed her. "Where were you?"

"I had to get something from the store," she said walking to the bed. "Hey, are we still planning to move or is that not necessary now that I know?"

"It's necessary. My brother is still out there."

"Is he really that dangerous? I mean what he did was years upon years ago, maybe he's changed?"

He lightly grabbed her shoulders, "He doesn't change. This happens more than you think and sometimes he drags me down with him. I do not want to go down that road again. Not when I have you."

She looked into his eyes then nodded. "Okay. You know him better than I do so I trust you."

He nodded then kissed her before moving over to the kitchen. "I was thinking uh, that I take you out tonight."

"With what money?"

"I have a little something lined up for later today and I'll use what I get paid for us."

"And what is it that you have lined up?"

"It's just a little job, no big deal."

"If it's no big deal then why won't you tell me exactly what it is?"

"Can I please just do something for my girl so that we can enjoy a nice dinner? Please? Because she deserves it so much and I need to be a better boyfriend."

She sighs rolling her eyes. "Fine."

He smiled then turned to the microwave hearing it beep. She laughed as he cursed picking up the hot bowl of noodles from the microwave dropping it on the counter. "Baby, seeing your baby in pain shouldn't be funny." He teased stirring the noodles with a fork.

"Oh whatever. You've laughed at me plenty of times when I was in pain."

"That's not true," he picked the bowl up this time with an oven mitt walking over to the bed.

Bonnie backed against the headboard as he got situated in front of her. "It is true, but it's OK." He blew on the fork of noodles then fed her before feeding himself. "When is my baby leaving me?"

He smiled then looked at his watch. "Three hours. When we're done eating, we can have sex for two."

She chuckled. He leaned in to kiss her for a few seconds before pulling away and fed her another fork of noodles.

* * *

Bonnie whined as his lips moved off of her as he got up from the bed. "Babe,"

"You wanna eat all good tonight? I have to get ready." He kissed her four times before heading to the shower.

* * *

He looked left and right before knocking on the door and walked in once it opened and kept walking forward until the door closed. Rogue smiled looking him over before walking up to him placing her hands on his shoulders and leaned in smiling as he moved his head away.

"I can't."

"And why not?"

"I'm with someone."

"That never stopped you before,"

"I've changed. Now tell me who needs to die so I can get paid and take my girl out for dinner."

Rogue let out a breath then reached on the hallway table handing him a folder.

 **;;;;**

Bonnie smiled as he walked through the door. "That didn't take long." She kissed him.

"I told you it was just a little something." He kissed her back then wrapped his arm around her. "Now put on that dress I like so we can go out tonight."

She smiled and headed to the closest and once she closed the bathroom door, Stefan started taking deep breaths filling his lungs with air before letting it out through his mouth. The kill made him want more, but he needed to control himself. It's been awhile since he took something on like this so he needed to do his ritual, but when it wasn't working, he reached far behind the cabinet and pulled out his bottle of scotch and drunk half of what was in the bottle before putting it back.

"Babe?"

He jumped slightly turning to see her. "Yeah?"

"Everything okay?"

"Why wouldn't it be?"

"You're so jumpy. And you won't stop tapping your ring against the counter."

He moved his hand away not noticing that he was doing it in the first place. "I was just thinking of something I forgot and was wondering if I should go now or later."

"Oh. Just go now since I'm not ready yet." He nodded then told her that he would be back.

Bonnie sighed and walked back into the bathroom to strip and pull the dress up her body. It was a soft peach color with a sweetheart neckline and loose skirt stopping once it hit the floor and also a little train to follow. She already washed her face, so she applied her makeup staying with natural colors because she knows that Stefan likes her that way the best.

Once she stepped out, Stefan was back buttoning his suit jacket. He smiled seeing her. "Look at my phenomenal woman." He kissed her gently twice then took her hand leading her out the door.

They took a taxi and some minutes later were pulled up in front of a grand building. Stefan paid the man and got out to open Bonnie's door. She smiled and took his hand and together they walked inside.

* * *

He kept one hand around her and the other on the right side of her face as they danced to the slow tune. After a nice dinner, Bonnie begged him to take her dancing and Stefan couldn't refuse her. He took her to the nearest jazz club and held her looking deep into her eyes. He didn't want to look anywhere but in her eyes and he was glad that she wasn't opposed to it.

Bonnie looked up at him loving the way that he would always look at her. He may have been a shitty boyfriend in the past, but even through it all, she knew that he never stopped loving her, not even for a second.

His head drew closer and their lips met kissing slowly like the beat of the song. His hold around her tightened as the kiss deepens and he moves his hand to squeeze her ass gaining a moan from her. Bonnie pulls away for air breathing deeply as she did so feeling Stefan's lips on her neck.

"Never…stop loving me,"

"Never," he repeated eight more times kissing up her neck. "You're stuck with me and only me till the end." Their lips met longingly once then once more.

"You promise?"

"I swear."

Their lips met again and as the song ended, he took her hand leading her over to the bar to get them drinks before sitting at an empty booth on the other side of the club. He sat as close to her as possible and kept one hand on her at all times.

"Babe?"

He caressed the side if her face, "Yes?"

"Um, what you said about not being fertile…is that really true or were you just stalling?"

He was taken aback by her question. "I… It's true. Us, we can't-"

She looked away, "Oh,"

"I'm sorry." He moved both hands to her face, "Don't leave me, please don't,"

"Trouble in paradise?" They looked over seeing Damon with a smile on his face.

"Go. Away."

"And miss all the fun, I don't think so." Stefan felt his fangs slip as he sat across from them. "So tell Dr. Damon what's the problem."

"Burn in hell."

"I'm sure I will someday, but not today." His eyes switched over to Bonnie seeing her quickly wipe away a tear. "What's wrong?" He asked like he truly cared.

Stefan returned his attention back to his love and frowned seeing her glossy eyes. "I'm sorry, I love you."

"I just always pictured us-"

"I know, I- let me make it up to you. Anything you want, I'll do it, I swear."

"I don't want you to do anything."

"Bonnie,"

"I need some space. I'll meet you back at our place."

His heart dropped to his stomach but nodded and moved back letting her free. Stefan watched her go doing everything in his power to not follow after her.

"That was intense." Damon said in amazement. "It's like I was watching a TV drama right in front of me." When his brother didn't respond, he sighed. "Seriously, what happened?"

"Why do you even care?" He stood then walked away leaving his brother sitting there alone.

* * *

An hour was the longest he could wait before he headed back to their apartment. When he noticed that she wasn't there, he started to panic but sat on the bed waiting for her to return and two hours later, she did.

Bonnie paused at the door before walking more inside kicking off her heels.

"I don't want us to go to bed angry or upset,"

"I just don't understand why you told me what you did last year."

"What did I say?"

"You asked me when are we having babies and I asked you if you wanted them and you told me that you wanted them with me. Why even say something like that in the first place when you knew it was impossible?"

"I'm an idiot, I'm so sorry, baby. I love you, I wanted that with you, I still do and I foolishly let it slip. I'm sorry. I didn't know it would mean this much to you,"

"It doesn't, I just… You put the idea in my head and I never truly let it go. I always thought of it happening as an accident but you'll be so happy and excited that I couldn't turn it away. We'll have a girl and just be a family."

He stood quickly walking over to her, "We can still be a family. Remember what you said, we can adopt or foster or get a donor, anything you want. I'll do anything, I'll agree to anything, just please don't leave me. I need you, I need you, I need you. You're everything to me. Everything."

"Why?"

"You're my soulmate."


	4. Chapter 3

Stefan watched her sleeping face pushing her hair back gently with his hand. He wished that he could see what she was dreaming about, what's on her mind so whatever it was, he can make it better. He needed everything to be better.

Bonnie kept her eyes closed feeling relaxed by his ministrations and even found herself dozing off sometimes. She moved closer and brought her arm around him and she heard him let out a breath moving closer himself before kissing her forehead and whispering something that she couldn't make out.

She doesn't know how many minutes or hours or seconds passed before she opened her eyes and a smile came to her face seeing that his eyes were now closed. She watched him until they opened and closed her eyes when he met their lips.

"Are we having a baby?"

She smiled. "Not yet. We're in no condition to have a baby right now."

"But you want to?"

"Possibly."

He nodded then kissed her again before holding her even closer. "What time do you have work?"

"I have the late shift today so around four. I stay till ten."

"I'll fix you a light dinner, yeah? For when you get back." She nodded letting out a breath through her nose.

"Can you hold me until I have to get ready?"

"Absolutely."

His hold tightens around her and he kisses her head again.

 **;;;;**

As the week ended, they started their packing. Stefan had made sure to stay at home most days and Bonnie hasn't told him about seeing Damon, so he figured that he wouldn't contact him at all. They only needed to pack their clothes and a few necessities and everything else, they would save for their landlord.

"You know I'm pretty excited to get out of here. I mean it's sucks that we'll be leaving behind three years of memories, but they weren't all that great of memories."

He nodded, "Yeah. Things will be much better in Miami. I can feel it."

Bonnie smiled then hugged him before getting back to packing. Stefan stepped behind her holding her lightly then kissed the side of her neck. She smiles continuing to place their things in duffle bags.

"What time does the bus leave?"

"I got us an early ticket, so four."

"I think that's best." She nodded. "I'll cuddle you when you fall asleep on the bus."

"Please, otherwise I can't sleep. Or stay asleep at least."

He nodded then turned her head to meet their lips a few times. She turned fully in his arms and he took it upon himself to lift her bringing her legs around his waist. "I love you."

"I love you too."

Their heads turned towards the door hearing knocks. Bonnie returned her feet to the floor and started to hide their bags as Stefan went to answer the door. He looked back and when she nodded, he turned and opened the door then sucked in a breath having felt himself being pushed up against the wall by his brother. Before Bonnie could get a word out, he pushed him back.

"Whoa, hey, I was just kidding around." Damon held up his hands stopping Stefan from moving his fist. He chuckled then turned his head hearing a fast heartbeat. "You must be Bonnie."

She looked over at Stefan before at him. "You must be Damon."

He smiled. "I mean we've met before, but it was never this formal. It's nice to meet you."

Stefan pushed him back taking his attention away from Bonnie and onto himself. "Get out."

"Why so soon? I just got here, lets have a little chat."

"No."

His face softened. "Come on, Stefan. I've changed. I just want to be your brother."

Stefan watched his eyes slowly dropping his defensiveness then looked over at Bonnie. She looked back saying or doing nothing wanting him to make the decision.

"Okay." He looked back at his brother.

Damon let out a small breath then walked across the space and sat on one of the chairs at the table. Stefan stretched out his hand which Bonnie took and he led them over to the table and sat her on his lap.

"So it looks like I owe you an apology, Bonnie. I thought you'd skip out on my brother once he told you."

"I love him and I promised."

He watched her face for a while then nodded once. "Well, Stefan, I guess you found the one."

He nodded. "So what about you, Damon, how's everything?"

"You know me, Stefan. Relationships aren't my forte. Other than that, I've just been around. Life gets pretty boring without my brother."

* * *

Bonnie watched him in thought as they faced each other on the bed. She knew the exact thoughts running through his mind because she's thinking the same things.

"Are we still going through with the plan?"

Stefan met her eyes. "Yes."

She was a little surprised, but she nodded accepting his answer. Like she said, Stefan knew his brother better than anyone so she wouldn't question him on his decision. What if she convinced him to stay and Damon flips and goes back to being an awful person then it'll be all her fault. Stefan would be angry with her and she didn't want that.

They got up at three and walked to the station boarding at three fifty. Stefan held her in his arms and didn't close his eyes until the bus pulled off not seeing a sight of Damon anywhere.

 **;;;;**

Bonnie held in her laugh as they watched an old video of them around the time they first started dating. It was funny because Stefan really did not want to be on camera but she didn't care making him upset which she found amusing.

She looked up at him now seeing him smile widely then she looked back down at the video just as it ended.

"You were so annoying," Stefan joked taking out the earbud from his left.

Bonnie opened her mouth and back slapped his arm lightly. "Shut up. You just didn't know how to have any fun."

He chuckled rolling his eyes causing her to laugh a little. They kissed before she stood needing to use the bathroom and he watched her until she made it peacefully there. Stefan let out a breath looking out the window sitting up some before squinting thinking that he's seeing Damon. The car is the same, but he's riding too much ahead for him to see his face. He leaned in a little closer but pulled back as Bonnie stood beside him.

"Everything ok?"

"Uh, yeah. Everything's fine."

She smiled then sat on his lap before kissing the top of his head holding him close. His arms went around her closing his eyes for a few.

"I love you."

"I love you more."

She kissed his head again before he looked up meeting their lips kissing her multiple times then moved his head down to her breasts causing her to conceal a moan when his hand moved up to squeeze.

"Fuck," he stopped realizing where they were. "I'm so used to fuckin you everyday, I need you so bad right now." He lightly nibbled on the side of her neck.

"Do it."

"Do what?" He kissed he lips twice.

"Bite me."

He chuckled but then his face went straight seeing the look on hers. "You're serious?"

She nodded, "Yeah."

His eyes shifted to her neck feeling his fangs tickle his gums. "Baby," he closed his eyes once she pulled his face closer her neck.

He made the mistake by inhaling, taking in her marvelous scent. His breath grew heavy the he opened his mouth sinking his fangs into her neck not being able to stop the groan that sounded from the back of his throat. He pulled away after a few seconds then licked her wounds. He discreetly bit into his wrist and held it to her mouth. She drank it without question then met their lips once she's had enough.

"I love you so damn much."

"I love you much more."

Stefan kissed her again moving his arms tightly around her then kissed where he had bit her. "I didn't hurt you, did I?"

She smiled. "No. You promised that you would never hurt me and you didn't."

He smiled looking in her eyes then kissed her longingly once. "I don't know how in the hell I got lucky enough to be with you. You're my everything." He kissed her and she smiled kissing him back.

"We're almost there," she observed looking out the window.

Stefan turned to look out it himself then nodded glad that they were able to get a fresh start so soon.

Once they arrived, they got dropped off in front of a hotel which they will stay for the remainder of the day. Stefan lifted her meeting their lips once she sat her bags down and carried her over to the bed.

* * *

He ran a towel down her hair dying it off a little making her smile. He kissed her lips then down her neck.

"I wish I had fangs like you do so I could bite you."

He chuckled. "No you don't."

"Yes I do."

He looked into her eyes sporting the same slight smile that was on her face. They breakaway hearing knocks on the door and Stefan looks through the peephole before answering. The man rolled in their food and Stefan paid him a tip before he left.

"Babe, our foods here."

"Okay,"

He lifted the lids off of the plates then looked back before eating a fry. Bonnie walked out just as he swallowed it which allowed him to breathe a little.

"Mmm, looks good."

"I'll feed you."

"How are you going to feed me a burger?"

"I'll feed you your fries,"

"I'll bite your hand off and you know it."

He sighed knowing that this was true. "Fine."

She chuckled then carried her plate over to the bed and Stefan joined her sitting close. He watched eat then looked away before watching her again before looking away, but he couldn't stay looking at the television for long. Not with her sitting next to him.

When she was done drinking the last of her water, they went for a walk inside the hotel. Taking the stairs to the next level up, holding hands and talking. Occasionally kissing and touching. When they made it back, they got together in the bed and held one another as close as possible. Comfortability was never an option, just closeness.

"I promise." Bonnie lowly says.

"I promise." He follows and she snuggles her head against him.

 **;;;;**

They walked out the hotel once Bonnie's cousin pulled up in front of it and she greeted them with a smile which they returned. Bonnie thanked her for allowing them to stay with her as she got in the back with Stefan who added on saying his thanks as well. She told them that it was no problem as she pulled off and thirty minutes later, they arrived.

Stefan got their bags from the trunk then followed the girls inside the lovely home.

This is what he wanted for them. No more hotels, no more struggles, just a nice, beautiful home anywhere that they wanted to live and settle down. He made a promise to himself as he was invited inside, that he would do his damn hardest to achieve that for them.

Lynn showed them where they would be staying then gave them a quick tour before she headed off to work. Stefan made them brunch and they got on the computer to start looking for jobs. They were open to anything. Bonnie found a chef job for Stefan at a local restaurant and she applied to a few modeling agencies and took up a few gigs that she saw listed on Craigslist for the time being. Stefan would accompany her to those just in case things went south, he told her.

They finished all that was on the plate then decided to go for a walk to visit the restaurant that hopefully Stefan would be cooking at soon. They loved how much people were already there knowing that this would stay in business for a long time. They ordered something small and cheap just to taste the food and were pleased with it. Bonnie knew that if all worked out, this will be the greatest thing that has ever happened to them so it needs to work out. It had to.


	5. Chapter 4

Stefan wiped the sweat off his brow getting ready to go on break. Working at the restaurant caused a lot of time and energy, but it's all worth it. Soon, he'd save up enough for a ring so he could surprise Bonnie with a proposal. She's been hinting to him that she wants to get married so he's been saving so he could give her what she wants. Anything she wants, he will provide it for her.

He listened to the phone ring hoping that she wasn't too busy to answer and a smile came to his face when he heard her voice.

"Hey, babe."

"I miss you."

"I miss you too. I was just about to call, I know you have your break now."

He smiled. "How's the shoot?"

"It's good. Almost done for today then I'll have a few weeks off."

"Yeah?" She hummed confirming. "That's good, you'll catch up on sleep."

"Only if you're there."

"I'll rush home every night, okay?"

"Yeah,"

"I love you so much."

"I love you so much more."

He let out a small breath. "Where are you?"

"At this country club type place, I don't think you'll have time." She knew what he wanted to do.

"Of course I will, just text me the address, okay?"

"Okay, I'll see you." She ended the call and quickly texted him the address.

She walked out to the front of the place and three minutes later, she smiled seeing him appear. She ran into his arms hugging him tightly as he breathed deeply managing to kiss her ear.

"I don't want you to leave me now." She says chuckling a little.

He pulled away. "You look beautiful."

"Thanks," she looked down at herself pushing some hair behind her ear.

He frowned a little then stepped up to her, "What's wrong?"

"Nothing, I just. I want to have a baby."

His eyes widened a little taken aback. "W-wow, I. Are you sure?"

She nodded, "Yes. O-only if you want to too."

"Anything for you-"

"But do _you_ want to? I don't want to do this if I'm the only one."

"I want this," he held her face.

She looked closely into his eyes and he looked back into hers. She knew how he was when it came to her, knew that he'll agree to almost anything, if not anything, when it came to her and what she wanted. She appreciated it, but wanted him to have a voice as well. "Think about for a little. If you're not ready, it's fine, I just want you to know how I feel and I want to know how you truly feel."

"Okay,"

She gave him a quick smile before meeting their lips kissing him softly. "I love you."

"I love you more." He kissed her again before he had to go.

 **;;;;**

Stefan sucked in a breath before entering their room. He thought about it and he thought about it some more until his shift was over and his mind was set but open at the same time.

Bonnie sat up smiling as he walked into their bedroom making him smile back before meeting their lips. He joined her on the bed and they laid facing each other.

"I want to marry you. I want to be stable, I don't want us living here, but in our own home. I want a family with you, I want to have a baby with you, but I don't think we're ready yet. When the time does come, I want us to have no worries about anything only about our baby. I want this, Bonnie, but just not yet."

"When do you think will be the right time?"

He thought. "Six months, give or take. We will be a family, I promise you."

She nodded, "You're right. We're not ready yet, I guess I was just-"

"You don't have to explain yourself, I get it. Come here," she moved in closer meeting their lips kissing each other a few times before he lifted her taking them both back to the shower.

* * *

Bonnie reached out for him just as he had gotten up. A frown came to her face when she didn't feel him, but that soon reversed as he got back in bed and kissed the top of her head and wrapped her in his arms. "Go back to sleep." He whispered rubbing her back gently.

She nodded then shortly she reentered her dreams and Stefan slowly slipped away.

* * *

Bonnie blew on her hot chocolate bringing her legs to her chest as she sat on the bed. She looked beside her where Stefan sleeps and sighed before looking back at the television.

She was home alone today at least for a few hours but she wished that she wasn't. Bonnie reached for her phone and smiled seeing a note right beside it.

 _Good morning, baby. I miss you so much already, but I'll try to stop by during my break if things aren't too busy here. Text me before you go anywhere and when you return so that I know that you're safe, please. Things are still new to us here, so I'm being extra protective. And I mean anywhere like even if you're going to get the mail, alright. I love you and I'll see you either on break or when I get home._

 _-S._

She smiled then sat the note back down where it was then stilled hearing the doorbell ring and narrowed her eyes. Getting up from the bed slowly, she moved towards the door. She looked out the peephole and relaxed seeing the mailman with a package in his hand.

"Hi,"

"Hello, I have a package for Lynn Jenkins."

She smiled then took the package after signing the form. After he went a few more houses down, she went back to grab her phone texting Stefan that she was going to get the mail. It was ridiculous, but she knew that he would be upset if she didn't do it.

It just got finished its daily morning rain shower so she wiped her hand on her shirt after pulling down the handle to the mailbox. She flipped through it heading back up the driveway and looked up thinking that she heard someone call out her name.

Bonnie quickly headed inside the house after spotting no one then locked the door behind her pulling out her phone to text Stefan that she made it back.

 **;;;;**

Stefan smiled widely at her nervousness as he led her to the kitchen. The restaurant was closed and everyone was at home, so he figured that now was the perfect time to show her around. She was afraid that they were going to get caught, but he told her that if they were, he could handle it. That didn't make her any less nervous though.

"I cooked you something."

"Really?" He nodded then went into the refrigerator pulling out a dish. "What is it?

"Calamari."

She smiled watching him take the wrapper off the dish then search for a fork. He lifted her on the counter making her smile. Stefan kissed her before feeding her one.

"You made this?"

"Of course. For you."

She smiled then their eyes closed as their lips met once. He fed her another moving some hair behind her ear. "You're so beautiful, babe."

She smiled. "You're so sweet to me."

He sighed. "I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"For hurting you. Breaking your heart, even. I was a horrible person and I don't even know why. The cheating, the lying, I don't know why I did that to the person I loved the most. The person who loved me the most. I just, I don't know,"

"I forgive you-"

"Why? I don't deserve anything from you. Believe me, I'm grateful, but I'm a monster."

She shook her head, "Not to me. I love you, Stefan. I always have and the love I have for you probably caused me to let you get away with things that I wouldn't with others, but still. I forgive you. You've changed, you're not the same person anymore, I'm not the same person anymore, and I think that's great. We're growing together, we're on the same page. I won't throw that all away."

"I love you. So much, Bonnie. I'm going to marry you, if you want me to. We'll have our baby and be a family. I'll die with you. Be buried right beside you. As close as possible. You're everything to me. All that I could ever ask for and more. This entire world. My soul cannot live without you, I'll die. I'll slowly fade because you're no longer by my side. I can't lose you. I just can't."

"And you won't. I'm not going anywhere. If anyone tells you different, don't believe them."

"I won't."

"Promise me."

"I promise." He did immediately. "I won't believe anyone."

She nods then pulls him hugging his head close.

* * *

Bonnie was on her back with the sounds of the ocean in her ears as she looked into his green eyes. Her right hand on the side of his face as he looked right back at her listening to her beating heart.

"Your heart always races for me." He says calmly.

"I love you all too much for it to be calm." She replies with a slight smile. "Sometimes I get scared because I could barely breathe properly."

He saw the truth in her eyes and slowly leans in, "Just once," he tells her hearing her heart pick up. Their lips meet softly then he pulls away wanting more but decides against it.

"Baby?"

"Yes?" He moves his eyes over her beautiful face.

"Words…cannot describe how much I feel right now, you know?" He nods slightly trailing his eyes quickly over her face then returns to her eyes. "I feel everything. All at once. The past. The present. A little of the future. All of it."

"You want it to stop?"

"Sometimes. But I feel like I'm supposed to do something with it, I just don't know what yet."

He watched her eyes. "You'll figure it out. You always do."

She smiled a little then took his right hand from off her face moving it between her legs. He watched her eyes fall closed as he took over moving more up her dress then rounds her thigh having her lips part slightly. He looks behind them glad that there's barely anyone on the beach at this time.

He meets there lips as his finger slips into her before two more follow. Her breath shortens in a raspy moan weakly reaching to pull off his belt.

* * *

He held her body pressed against his as her tongue slipped into his mouth slowly flicking the back of his front teeth before their lips met again leaning their heads to opposite sides. He growled grabbing her ass then turned them having her on her back with her leg raised around him. He pushed his hips into her. He wanted her again, but he could tell that she was tired, so he controlled himself.

"Drink from me," she breathed deeply turning her head so he had view of her neck.

He moved her head back to kiss her slowly a few times over before sinking his fangs into her neck. He swallowed large gulps before pulling away breathing deeply.

"Turn me into a vampire."

"What about our baby?"

She shrugged. "All I want is you, all I need. I want to bite you and live forever with you."

He chuckled. "Here," he bit into his wrist, "bite me and drink." She does exactly that then as soon as she pulled away, he met their lips kissing her roughly. He found nothing more sexier than her drinking from him. "In the morning, if you still want to-"

"I will,"

He smiled. "Then I will turn you." She nods then they meet in a kiss. "You're the only one," he took a few breaths, "for me."

She smiled reaching her hands up to the sides of his face but before she could reach, a large boot swung in front of her kicking him right in the face knocking him backwards a little before falling onto his side.

She harshly gasped and tears were ready to fall from her eyes watching her love on the sand. She then looked over seeing Damon with a grin on his face. As she opened her mouth to yell, he was gone. And so was Stefan.

 **TBC**


	6. Chapter 5

Stefan's eyes blinked open feeling himself weaken by the second. As his eyes adjusted and landed on his brother, his anger grew and if he could, he would have his heart in his hand, but he was chained down to a chair.

"Easy, brother."

"Where is she?" He growled.

"She's dead."

Everything that made him up fell apart. "How could you do this to me?"

"I didn't do it, Stefan. Bonnie died close to a year ago in an accident. She was doing some modeling on a motorcycle and she fell, hit her head against the street. You were working and by the time you got there, it was too late."

"You're lying."

"I'm not, Stefan. I knew I never should have let you do this,"

"Do what?"

He let out a breath. "I tried, Stefan. I've never seen you like that before. We've been through hell, but never like that. I've caught you trying to kill yourself multiple times, killing others, harming anything in sight. So I found someone. A witch, I- I asked her to help you. I thought that if you could just see her one more time that everything would go away."

"What are you talking about?"

"You were dreaming. All of it was truth, what you saw did happen, but that was in the past. She told me that the longer you slept, the more difficult it would be to snap you back to reality, but when I would go to wake you, you would always have this smile on your face and I just couldn't. I know I'm a shitty brother, but I couldn't tear that away from you. It's been three months, so I tied you up because I knew that you would react badly."

"You're lying."

"I'm not."

"I want to see her. Visit the grave, I need to-"

"She was cremated. Her ashes sprinkled in the sea."

"That wasn't the plan, we wanted to be buried together."

"She changed her mind. She never wanted you to end your life so she made herself non-existent. She wanted you to move on quickly."

His heart picked up. "I don't believe you! She wanted to be a vampire, I was going to turn her do we could live together forever, she-"

"You told me that you couldn't do it. You wanted to, but you couldn't because you didn't want her to have such a curse. She was mad at you, but she got over it."

"I don't believe you!"

"Stefan," he dropped his thought then walked out of the room then shortly returned with a newspaper. He let the chains loose from his brother's wrist then handed it to him. "Read it yourself."

Stefan looked up reading his brother's eyes then the paper. His hands shook finding her picture among the others in the obituary and tears fell from his eyes like a storm. He clinched the paper in his hands staring at her beautiful face in the black and white picture and Damon cursed as he quickly slipped off his ring and stood in front of the window. He tackled him into the bed holding him down struggling to put the ring back on.

"Stefan. This isn't what she would've wanted."

"Fuck you, you have no idea what she wants!" He tries to fight but no matter how angry he is, he's weak.

Damon loosens his hold as his brother breaks down again and for the second time in his life, he holds him feeling tears swell in his eyes, but he holds them back. "I'm sorry. Okay, I'm sorry. I don't know how you feel, but you need to try and live. That's what she wanted, Stefan, I wouldn't lie to you. Not about this."

"How come I don't remember?"

He thought. "I don't know, the spell, maybe."

"I need. To see her."

Damon sighed then nodded.

 **;;;;**

Stefan sat on the edge of the dock looking into the sea in which she was sprinkled in. It was as blue as the sea would get around here and he could only blame Bonnie for that.

He couldn't believe that she was gone. Those dreams felt all too real for it to be a simple dream.

"How come I'm not dead?"

"Like I said, you've tried, but I-"

"But still. I should be dead. You said a year, right? Close to it. My being can't survive without her, I should be dead."

He sighed. "Stefan, that's just something you say. You're a vampire, you can't die over a broken heart. Not figuratively anyway."

His eyes closed causing him to still when Bonnie filled the blackness. She was crying lying on the bed, the saddest he's seen her in awhile. His heart broke watching her and thought that maybe this was her now, but then he appeared himself wrapping his arms around her only for her to push him off.

 _"I hate you."_

 _"I never thought-"_

 _"That I'd never catch you cheating on me again, well yeah, me either."_

 _"It wasn't my intention to sleep with her, I just-"_

 _"That's what you said the last two times! Do you even love me at all?"_

 _"Of course I do."_

 _"You're lying. You don't love me, so we're done. I never want to see you again."_

 _"Wait, Bonnie, I- I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I will never make that mistake again, I need you, I needed you but you weren't here so I just- I went out and. I'm so sorry. It will never happen again, I promise. I fucking swear." He kissed her. "I swear. Don't leave me, please."_

His eyes opened with a sigh remembering how horrible of a person he was to her. She didn't deserve any of it. She should've left him that day and never looked back, but he was selfish. He needed her but treated her like shit on a sidewalk and none of it was fair.

Her death is his fault. If he never forced her to stay, she wouldn't have to be modeling and she would've been living her life in a different way. Probably back in New York still in that bookstore, but it was safe. She would've been safe, but he forced them to leave.

It's all his fault. All of it.

* * *

Damon sighed watching him sit still at the rounded table. He's been in that spot for three hours just stirring there staring into space. He's tried to talk to him but got nothing in return. He was starting to think that this was worse than the killings. He's shutting down. Maybe he can die from a broken heart.

The only thing he knew was Bonnie. That was all that was in his head, nothing else. No one else but the love of his life.

How could he not remember her death? Spell or not, that's something that he should remember. He needs to remember getting the call and rushing to the hospital. Or maybe Lynn drove to his work and told him and together they drove to the hospital. He needed to remember the doctor telling him that they did everything they could to save her life. He needed to know if he choked the guy out and needed others to pull him off or if he just accepted it. He needed to remember seeing her body laying there in the hospital. Her still body, he needed to remember no longer hearing her heartbeat so that he knows what he's been told is the Truth. He needed to remember but he doesn't.

 **;;;;**

 _Stefan? Stef?_

His body tightened as his head swung back and forth.

 _Are you in here? It's me, it's-it's Bonnie._

Sweat started to stain his clothes going through the sheets.

 _I figured it out. I figured out what I'm supposed to do with my feelings. With all of them. Just like you said._

His body shook hearing her voice but her face was non-existent.

 _Are you in here? They said- they said that- Hello?_

He turned on his side gripping the sheets in his hand slowly tearing them apart.

 _Stef? …Please don't._ _Ahhh!_

He shot up from the bed breathing deeply looking around the darkened room. His eyes moved down to his hands which were shaking rapidly but moved them up to his forehead wiping away the sweat.

He got out of bed dragging his feet heading for the kitchen. It's been a week since he's been without her and the first time he's been able to sleep, he had a dream like this. Only he wonders if it's really a dream.

Maybe she's still out there and this whole thing is one big awful joke that Damon's playing on him for leaving without telling him and this is his revenge. Maybe this is all just. One big game.

 **;;;;**

Damon looked up catching Stefan staring at him for the tenth time today. He didn't bother looking away forcing himself to stare right back at him because he found it all so weird but the staring didn't last long as he turned away. He wondered what was going through his mind, what was causing him to look at him in this way. He looked up again meeting his eyes then let out a breath.

"You should know that I'm not into incest." He paused before continuing when Stefan remained quiet. "You know what they say about a picture. It lasts longer."

"Stop jerking yourself off." He said standing then walked away.

Stefan closed the door behind him locking himself in his room pulling out a binder from under his bed then sat on top of the mattress. He let out a breath opening it stopping to smile and touch the picture he has of his love then looked on the page beside it letting out another breath before reading over what he had written.

It was a behavioral book dedicated to Damon. He needed to know of he was guilty. Guilty about lying to him about Bonnie and the only way he can truly know that is through his actions.

He figured if he stared at him like he knew something that Damon would slowly crack and so far he couldn't figure out what was going on. At first, he would act guilty; messing with his hair, clearing his throat after every sentence he told, avoiding eye contact. Now, he's acting more neutral but the talking back is giving him more guilty vibes than anything.

He look up and over hearing the doorbell ring and gets up slowly once he hears Damon greet whoever it was.

Damon turned to call for his brother, but before he could get a word out, Stefan was already making is way slowly down the stairs.

"Lynn,"

She tightly smiled. "Hey, Stefan."

"What are you doing here?"

"Well, Damon told me that you started having a little trouble again so I thought that I drop by to see how you're doing."

He watched her eyes as she slowly walked up to him. She could always be compelled, he told himself. "I'm fine now,"

"Please, this is. This is kind of for me too."

Tears threatened his eyes. If she was compelled to just come over and see how he was doing, she wouldn't be persistent. Unless Damon compelled her to be. "Um. Yeah, sure, we can just. Go in my room, I guess."

She nods holding a thick book close to her chest and Stefan watches her head up a few stairs before he's behind her.

 **;;;;**

"You know I hated you at first." Lynn said staring down at a picture of the two in the album.

He looked over at her. "Why?"

"I don't know, when I first met you, I just got this vibe. Bonnie told me that she was happy and in love so I just kept it to myself."

"Well to be honest with you, I didn't like myself much either back then. I didn't deserve Bonnie at all."

"We all deserve love and someone who loves us. Everyone has a past, everyone has a little monster inside them, some more than others, but it's there nonetheless. We just need someone who will tame it."

He thought before asking, "Who's your tamer?"

She smiled some. "I've had multiples, I'm not in that lucky category where I have my one yet. I know Bonnie was yours,"

"She was more than that. She was my everything. Still is. My heart will never stop beating her name."

Lynn watched him in thought before reaching her hand out to place it on top of his. He smiled a little before topping her hand with his other.

* * *

Stefan growled turning on his stomach.

 _Her head tilted back giving him the perfect view of her sweaty neck as she came in a silent scream. His eyes raked her body taking in her sparkling skin then shortly filled her up with his seed. She smiles._

 _"What will you remember about me?" She asks running her hands down the side of his neck to his arms._

 _"Everything."_

 _"Everything? When I'm dead, you'll remember everything there is about me?"_

 _"Why wouldn't I?"_

 _"But if you could choose one thing. What will it be?"_

 _He looked her over again pushing his hips into her slightly causing her to let out a moan. "Defiantly the way you feel."_

 _She bit down on her lower lips enjoying_ his _feel. "How would you describe it?" She asks in a breath._

 _"Warm," he kissed her neck still slowly moving his pelvis. "Tight. Home." Her breathing picked up as his fang ran down her neck. "It's almost indescribable. But it's the best damn feeling in this entire world." Their eyes met then their lips shortly as he picks up pace._

Stefan curses waking up then heads into the bathroom to take care of business. He turns on the shower, closes his eyes and before he could think, there she is hidden behind his lids. Her body perfect in every way, her moans, her nails on his back and kisses on his lips. The feel of her, the taste of her hits him like a train and his head is pressed against the tile as he releases.

He breathes deeply then reaches over shutting off the water.

* * *

He looked up seeing his brother walk in then rolled his eyes focusing back on his push ups.

"We should go out tonight."

"I don't think so." Stefan continued to pump his arms.

"You've been cooped up in this house for too long, I think that going out will do you some good. And who knows, maybe you'll find a new-"

Stefan sped pressing his back against the wall with his hands squeezing his neck. A vein was close to popping on his arm and neck as he managed through gritted teeth, "No one will ever replace her. Understand?"

"Yes," he struggled then breathed deeply as his brother let go. Damon found his way to the floor. "I'm just trying to help. No one has to replace her, but you can still have fun."

"I don't want to have fun, I'm fine exactly as I am." He took the towel resting on the loveseat and wiped his face before letting it rest around his neck. "Where are we, Damon?"

His eyes narrowed. "What do you mean?"

"Where are we? Last I remember Bonnie and I were on the beach in Miami."

"We're still here,"

"How did you find us?"

"Well," he let out a breath, "a few days after I visited you guys at your apartment, I went back and you two weren't there. I must admit that it hurt, so I asked Bonnie's boss where you two headed off and she told me here."

He let out a breath. "And then what?"

"You seriously don't remember?" He shook his head. "Then I started talking to Bonnie privately, it took some time for her to actually listen, but I guess when she saw me to be not a monster, she told you and we met up and you gave me another shot. I'm sure it was all for Bonnie's sake, but,"

"Was she happy?"

"From what I could tell, yes. I wasn't around all the time so I can't give you a definite an-"

"Were we engaged?"

"Not yet."

His eyes closed as he breathed out through his nose. He just couldn't understand why they wouldn't be. It was all in his plan, they should've been engaged if not married so he wonders where everything went wrong.

"Who's house is this?"

"It's ours. After the funeral I decided that you really shouldn't be alone so I got us this house."

"I need you to tell me again."

"What?"

"How she died, I need to hear the story again."

He sighed, "Stefan, are you sure that this is the best idea? You seem pretty angry, I don't-"

"Just tell me the fucking story!"

"Bonnie was modeling on a motorcycle, she went to get off it but slipped somehow and fell off hitting her head on the road. She was rushed to the hospital, but in the end there was nothing that they could do. The damage was already done."

"Where was I?"

"You were at work. At the restaurant cooking or whatever you do there and Lynn called you and told you but by the time you got there, it was too late."

"Where were you?"

"I was at a bar when I got a call telling me the end result."

"You're lying to me, Damon."

"Stefan, I know that this is hard to understand, but I'm not. I don't know why you don't remember, if I had to guess it's all the magic, but I don't know. She's gone and I'm sorry, I really am, but she's gone. You saw the paper for yourself, I don't know what else I can do."

"I need to see her."

He let out a breath. "Stefan, she's ash now. She's a part of the ocean-"

"I'll be back."

"Where are you going?"

Stefan ignored him walking past him then out the door.

* * *

The liquid rushed through his fingers and soaked his body as he swam. He needed to feel her, feel her power and her soul but he couldn't. He knows it's been almost a year since her death, but he hoped that he would at least feel something.

He swam further then floated on his back. The sun shined down on him causing him to think that if he just slipped off his ring that he'd too be ash in the ocean. The only problem was that he wasn't completely convinced that she was gone. Not yet and he's not sure if he ever will be.

* * *

He got lip from the lifeguard about him swimming out too far but compelled him to shut the hell up then walked away.

"Uh, excuse me?" He turned seeing a woman with green eyes and brunette hair. "Uh I know how crazy this might sound, but are you Stefan?"

His eyes narrowed and something within him shifted.

* * *

 **A/N: So tell me your thoughts/theories! Who is this woman? How does she know Stefan?**


	7. Chapter 6

Lynn frowned watching her cousin sit in one of the chairs at the table. When Bonnie arrived home, it was late and she was downstairs getting a midnight snack when she bumped into her cousin. At first, Lynn smiled happy to see that they made it back safely, but that smiled faded when she noticed that something was wrong. She questioned her but never got an answer. She noticed that Stefan wasn't there so she figured that maybe they had broken up, so she helped her upstairs and laid in the bed with her hoping that she could provide some comfort.

The next morning, she woke up and noticed that Bonnie was already awake and wonders if she even went to sleep last night. She tried talking to her, but again, nothing.

They headed downstairs so Lynn could fix some breakfast, still talking to her and as she finished with the last pancake, she walked over to the table frowning at her cousin's face for a tear had slide down it.

"Bonnie, talk to me, I'm here for you." She rubbed her back some. "Is it about Stefan?" She wanted to avoid saying his name, but hoped that it would get her talking.

Bonnie looked over at her cousin whose eyes held concern. She wanted to tell her, but her brain wouldn't let her. She's still in shock over everything that happened and everything within her felt black.

He's gone, Stefan is gone and it's all because of Damon. She wondered how he found out where they were, how he knew where they would be. She starts to blame herself, she thought that she heard someone call out her name when she went to get the mail yesterday, but didn't tell Stefan about it. Maybe if she told him, he would've been more prepared, but now he's gone and she has no idea where he is, she just hopes that he's still around.

* * *

Lynn found her bending over a toilet and quickly rushed to her side rubbing her back as she continued. She felt horrible, she needed to know what was going on so that she could help, but Bonnie wouldn't tell her a word.

They stood together and her shaking hands reached to turn on the water cupping the liquid in her hands, bringing it up to her mouth, spitting it out.

"Bonnie-"

"He's gone. Damon took him from me."

"Who?"

"Stefan. His brother, he found us and knocked him out and took him away. I couldn't do anything to stop it."

Lynn's eyes widened. "W-why would he do that?"

"Because we left him. Damon isn't a good guy, but one day he shows up and asks to be in Stefan's life again. We were already packed to move here and I asked him if he still wanted to move and he said yes, so we did. Damon must've figured out where we were and took him for revenge."

Lynn shook her head no believing that a person could do such a thing. "I'm so sorry, Bonnie. Do you think he'll hurt him?" She regretted asking, but the question left her mouth before she could stop it.

She thought. "No. Hurting him would be too easy,"

Again, Lynn was shocked hearing such a thing and started to wonder if this Damon was some type of psychopath.

She helped get Bonnie cleaned up more before making her eat something. It's been too long since her body has been without food and she knew that her cousin was in shock, but she still needed to eat.

Bonnie thanked her for the pizza and ate two slices. She tried to conceal the feeling, but something is different within her. She knows it's because that Stefan is gone and it's like a piece of her is missing. She's not the same and knew that she wouldn't return unless she gets her Stefan back.

She just hoped that he was okay, that whatever Damon is doing to him, that he survives.

 **;;;;**

Bonnie convinced Lynn that she would be fine alone and that she should go to work so she wouldn't lose her job. A few hours after she left, Bonnie headed out with a stake in her purse just in case Damon decided to take her as well. She would let him just so that she'll be able to see her love, but she would fight her way free. Their way free.

She looked both ways before walking into a tent. She needed answers and figured that seeing a psychic would give that to her. They talked a little on the phone previously just so that she could make sure that he was able to give her the answers that she was seeking.

Bonnie sat in front of him, glad that he didn't have one of those fake crystal ball things and looked into his eyes as he looked into hers. He was reading her, she could tell, so she didn't break contact.

"Bonnie Bennett. Dating a... vampire?"

"That's correct."

He swallowed. "And you're a witch?"

"I'm a what?"

He frowned a little. "You didn't know?"

She shook her head, "No, I- I was clueless. I guess this somewhat explains the feelings I've been having. I feel a whole lot, maybe it's just my powers."

"For someone who was clueless, you're really taking the news well,"

"I'm dating a vampire, I can handle a whole lot more... Although I'll probably faint tomorrow once this truly sets in."

He chuckled causing her to smile a little. "So back to the reason you're here, you need to find your boyfriend. Unfortunately with him being what he is, this doesn't make my job easier. He's dead essentially, but I'll try my best."

Bonnie nodded. "I bought his journal, he writes in it a lot."

Fred took the journal from her hands placing one hand on the cover and the other directly beneath it on the back of the book. She watched him inhale then exhale before he went silent. She closed her eyes as well hoping that this would all work out.

Her eyes popped open hearing him gasp a little then soon, he spoke. "I can feel him. He's near but far, he's still here. I can't get a certain location, but he's here." Bonnie smiled. "You need to find him, Bonnie. I feel that he's fading, he's hanging on but fading. Just as you are."

His eyes opened.

 **;;;;**

It's been a week and every day since visiting Fred, she's printed out fliers and handed them to people walking around whoever she went. She was going about it as someone would when they're trying to find a missing person and figured that the more eyes she had looking out for him, the better.

Night had fallen and after a long day of searching and handing out fliers, she treated herself to a drink at a local bar. She texted Lynn telling her where she was knowing that she's been getting a little concerned lately no matter how often Bonnie kept reminding her that she's fine.

The only reason she's been throwing up lately was because Stefan wasn't with her, when she finds him, all of it would stop.

"Excuse me, you're looking for that boy, right? Er, Stefan?"

Bonne turned to the man with her eyes widening a little, "Yes, have you seen him?"

"I'm not sure, but I think I've seen him lurking around."

"Where?"

* * *

"Stefan? Stef?" Bonnie called out slowly opening the door to the abandoned workshop just outside of Miami. "Are you in here? It's me, it's- it's Bonnie."

Her steps were steady and although she wanted to be quick, she needed to be prepared just in case Damon popped up instead. Her hands gripped onto the stake in her bag ready to draw it at anytime.

"I figured it out. I figured out what I'm supposed to do with my feelings. With all of them. Just like you said." She told referring back to seeing the physic.

She rounded the corner then gasped snapping her head to the right when she heard a noise.

"Are you in here? He said- he said that- Hello?"

She stilled seeing a shadow in the shape of a human. "Stef?" Not daring to move, she waited seeing the shadow come closer and let out a breath seeing the guy from the bar. It didn't take her long to realize that this was a setup to get her alone.

"Please don't." She said to him stepping back. She didn't want to hurt him, but she will if he got in the way of her finding Stefan.

When he charged at her, she felt her powers shoot inside her so she held out her hands, " _Ahhh!_ " She screamed letting the power exit her sending the man backward crashing into the drywall.

Her heart was racing not sure how she did that but left quickly before someone else joined the party.

 **;;;;**

Bonnie laid sprawled out on her bed. She was feeling a mixture of emotions one of which was excitement because she's been getting better with her powers each day. Sick because a piece of her was missing causing her body to react negatively. A little hopeless because it seemed that no matter how many fliers she's passed out, no matter how hard she's searched, she got nothing in return. Nothing besides a dead end.

"Knock, knock," Lynn sounded walking in.

Bonnie turned her head and smiled seeing her cousin. "Hey, girl."

"You seem to be getting better," Lynn noted joining her on the bed.

She let out a breath. "I feel a lot of things. But I just want Stefan back."

"Have you heard anything at all?"

"Not yet. I hope something comes soon though."

"I'm sure something will. You passed out thousands of those fliers, _someone_ had to see him around somewhere."

"I just hope that someone is kind enough to actually say something."

Lynn let out a breath and placed her hand on her cousin's shoulder. "How about we go out today? Do a little shopping to distract your mind for awhile. You know what they say, when you're not looking for something, that's when something happens."

She chuckled. "Sure, that sounds like fun. I could use a little distraction, then tomorrow, I'll be back on it."

Lynn nodded then told her that they'd leave in ten minutes.

* * *

This was exactly what she needed, Stefan never left her mind, but for the first time in awhile, she didn't think that he was in danger. With her acting like everything was fine, it made it easier to stay positive about Stefan's situation. She even bought a few things for him and bought things that she knew he'd like to see her in.

Lynn smiled feeling like it's been forever since Bonnie's talked so much or smiled so much. She was glad that she was able to help, the last thing she wanted was her cousin depressed so she knew that she had to do something. She was glad that Bonnie was optimistic as well, and she knew so because they've made a few stops in men's stores so she could pick up a few things for Stefan and when she would try things on, she would ask her if she thinks that Stefan would like it. It was great seeing her the slightest of happy since everything happened.

* * *

After a long day of shopping, they decided to get something to eat. Lynn didn't get the chance to show her her favorite restaurant so she thought that now was the perfect time.

"I love coming here, the food is amazing."

"I can't wait to taste. I have a major craving for some lasagna."

She chuckled then their waiter came and took their orders.

"So I honestly didn't want to bring it up, but I just have one question."

"Shoot,"

Lynn let out a breath trying to figure out a way to say it. "So Damon shows up while you both were on the beach, kicks Stefan, knocks him out then carries him away? How is all that possible without someone seeing. And I mean you came back without a scratch and I know that you would've tried to fight Damon to let Stefan free. I just- it's so weird to comprehend."

Bonnie nodded then looked down before returning her eyes back to her cousin. "That's because Stefan and his brother, they're…vampires."

Lynn opened her mouth not exactly sure how to respond. Luckily, she was given a few extra seconds to think as their waiter gave them their drinks. "Uhh, I don't think- I mean I want to believe you, but that's just ridiculous."

"I know it is and I know how it sounds, but it's true. And I guess while we're on the topic of the supernatural, I should let you know that I'm a witch."

She sighed. "Bonnie, I, I think this whole thing just caused you to think a little… off? I mean the only "witches" that I know of are in tents telling people their fortune for money."

"Those aren't witches. If you can believe in that then why not believe in a witch?"

"Because that's just ridiculous. This isn't Twilight, this is the actual world."

Their food arrived and were told to enjoy their meal.

"I'll prove it to you. Once we get home, I'll prove to you that what I say about myself is true."

"Okay, and if you can do that, I'll believe what you say about Stefan."

Bonnie nodded agreeing to the deal.

* * *

Lynn sat on the couch facing her cousin just watching her stand there.

"Okay, so maybe this wasn't a good idea, I just found out, I don't know any spells. Unless I'm scared and need to defend myself. Oh! I can show you where I used my powers to knock a man into the drywall when he tried attacking me."

"What? When did this happen?" She sat up shockingly.

"It was when everything freshly happened. I was at a bar and this man told me that he thought he saw Stefan lurking around this old house-"

"You actually believed him?"

"I wasn't so much in my right mind then and I needed to find him so I went. I went and called out his name a few times but I didn't hear an answer. I heard this noise maybe a minute in and I turn and I see this shadow and I'm hesitant hoping that it was Stefan, but I kind of knew that it wasn't. So he steps up and I see that it's the guy from the bar then I knew that I've been set up. He starts to charge at me and I feel my powers surfacing but I was scared so I screamed and before I knew it, he was thrown into the wall."

"Then what did you do?"

"I got my ass out of there. I had no idea I had that in me and I didn't want him to wake up and try to go after me so I just came back here."

Lynn blinked a few times. "Wow. Well if that's true, then I do not want to go back over there. He could still be there and I do _not_ want to deal with that."

Bonnie chuckled the joined her cousin on the couch. "So do you believe me?"

She let out a breath. "I guess."

Bonnie shook her head but accepted it.

 **;;;;**

After an exciting day yesterday, today felt like one of the most boring days of her life. Lynn had to go to work leaving her alone with nothing to do.

Instead of staying in all day like she planned, Bonnie decided to go for a walk. Not to pass out fliers, but just to walk. She walked to the beach and looked out to the shore narrowing her eyes seeing some idiot floating in the middle of the ocean. They could get themselves killed for being so far out.

Shaking her head, she kept walking and stopped for a hotdog feeling hungry. She let out a breath after taking a bite realizing that she wasn't in the mood for a hotdog having to throw it away.

"Hello?" She answered her phone.

"Hey, Bonnie, it's John. I was wondering if you're free tomorrow for a shoot."

She thought and figured that doing a little modeling would provide a good distraction from everything. "Yeah, that will be great."

"Alright, I'll text you the info."

After that, Bonnie decided to head home.


	8. Chapter 7

He felt like an idiot, a complete idiot that he didn't think of this sooner. Lynn coming to visit probably knocked this thought right out of his head but as that woman approached him on the beach and told him that his Bonnie has been looking for him for weeks, he rushed over to Lynn's house, but before he could make it there, he saw her.

She was walking along the sidewalk ready to head home when she stopped in her trail. She felt something, a shift in the air and her heart started pounding. Closing her eyes, Bonnie turned around and when her eyes landed on him, her knees weekend, but before she could hit the ground, Stefan catches her and instantly she meets their lips. She starts to cry, but continues kissing him, missing him more than she thought that she did.

Stefan let a few tears slip himself and pulled away so he could hug her tears away.

"Where were you?" She asked through her madness of tears.

"I don't know, Damon, he- he told me you were dead, that you've been dead for a year and all this time I was just dreaming about us." He held her closer.

"You didn't believe him, did you? You promised, you promised that if anyone told you that I was gone that you wouldn't believe them, you promised."

He cried. "Only for a second, I swear. I only believed him for a second, because he had made up proof and I was weak and I- I- I'm sorry, baby, I'm so sorry."

She held him tighter and closer, her nails piercing through his shoulders. "It's okay,"

He shucked in his tears, lifting her legs around his waist before he took them to Lynn's house. She was shocked to see him and wanted to ask many questions, but the way Bonnie was clinging to him, she knew that they needed their time alone. She was just glad that everything was okay.

Stefan laid her on the bed and met their lips again before pulling away.

"What?"

He smiled breathing out, "You're pregnant."

Her eyes narrowed. "W-what, how can I-"

"I can hear the heartbeat. I can hear it beating."

He quickly moved down to her stomach lifting her shirt then slowly placed his head down until his ear was pressed against in lightly. A tear fell from his eye and he moved his head to kiss her there.

"I've been throwing up a lot lately but I just thought it was because I was without you, but I guess I was wrong." She chuckled on the verge of tears. "I was pregnant, I'm pregnant."

He smiled and met their lips moving his hand down touching her stomach. "I love you so much."

"I love you so much." Their lips met again before they pulled each other into an embrace.

* * *

Side by side they lay, looking into each other's eyes, holding hands with small smiles on their faces. They've been enjoying the quiet for two hours after talking to Lynn who made them both eat. They kept the news about their baby to themselves for now because they wanted to enjoy this alone for now. After their meal, they headed back to their room to be alone together.

Stefan moved his arm around her running it up her back kissing her twice.

"You have to leave me tonight." Bonnie whispered.

"I'm never leaving your side ever again."

"You have to. Damon is still out there, this will be the first place he looks. I can't put Lynn in danger or our baby."

"I'll kill him. Tonight, I'll rip his heart out from his chest. He took me away from you, I will kill him."

Bonnie nodded knowing that it was the only way that they would truly be protected and free from him. She had their baby to think about and though she didn't want Stefan to kill his own brother, it was honestly the only way.

When night fell, Stefan kissed her goodbye for a couple of hours. He still didn't want to leave her, but he needed to get this done. The thought of killing his brother hurt him, but Damon's more sick then he thought.

He compelled someone to put Bonnie's picture in the obituary, made up a sick lie, watched him suffer and all for what? He gets that he was upset about them leaving suddenly, but why not torture him? Why lie about it?

Stefan stood beside his brothers bed not so much watching him sleep. Knowing that he might regret this, Stefan shook him awake and his eyes opened instantly.

"Stefan?"

"I have to kill you, Damon."

He looked at his brother like he was insane sitting up. "What the hell are you talking about?"

"We found each other. Bonnie was looking for me, passing out fliers and this girl told me, and I found her. I just don't understand why. Why stay here when she is here, she wouldn't give up on me. Why make up this lie, why not just kill me?"

Damon sighed. "We were only going to stay here one more day, I was going to convince you to leave." He confessed. "And I didn't kill you, because like I said back in New York, I actually miss my brother. I didn't kill Bonnie because I wanted her to suffer. She took you away from me."

Stefan narrowed his eyes surprised by his answer. "I don't want to have to kill you, Damon,"

"And yet here you are." He smiled. "So what are you waiting for?"

He stepped back some as he stood from the bed and spread his arms out challenging his brother. When he didn't move, Damon smiled then slapped his arms down back to his sides.

"You can't do it. No matter how much you may want to, you can't do it." Stefan remained silent. "I'm willing to put this all behind us, forgive you for this little stunt on one condition. You leave Bonnie. We make ourselves scarce, leave town."

"I can't do that. I'm not leaving her."

His face went straight then after a while, lifted his eyebrow up to his hairline. "Fine. Then I guess I'll have to kill you."

Stefan narrowed his eyes then quickly moved out of the way as his brother sped towards him and repeated.

Damon found himself on his back. "Don't make me do this, Damon. Just. Just promise that you'll leave us alone and I won't have to do this."

"I'm not a child, Stefan. You and your stupid promises." He switched their positions holding his brother's neck in his hand. "Last chance, brother."

"Damon," he reached his arms up holding his hand back forcing it away from his chest. "Stop this!"

"You started it! I'm just going to finish it."

He removed the hand from around his neck to punch him a few times and once his other hand was free from his hold, Damon aimed for his heart once again, but found himself being flung back, crashing into a wall.

Stefan looked shockingly over growing more shocked as his eyes landed on Bonnie. She rushed over to him making sure that he was okay.

"Bon—" he tried to warn but was too late as Damon kicked her in the stomach knocking her over.

He sped over to his older brother grabbing him by the neck smashing his head against the wall in rage. He then threw him on the floor, punching and over and over having his blood marking his face and continued to beat him, and just as he was slowly fading, Stefan tore his heart out from his chest.

His breath grew heavy as he stared at his brother but then hurried over to Bonnie's side helping her up gently as she held her stomach. She winched in pain the let out a cry feeling liquid rub down her legs as she bled.

Stefan shook his head repeated the word 'no' over and over realizing what had happened. "This is all my fault, Bonnie, I- I'm so sorry. It's all my fault, everything is all my fault."

He held her as she cried in mourn and he soon joined in as well, crying as he said his apology to her and to their lost child.

* * *

Bonnie stood there numb as Stefan rubbed soap on her body to wipe away the dried blood. A tear would run down her cheek occasionally, but she never moved to wipe it away. They spoke not a word as he scrubbed too roughly turning her thighs a shade of red before he realized that he was going too hard on her. He turned on the water and used a different cloth to wash it away this time using gentle movements. After the blood was off he lifted her out and started a bath, filling it with her favorite scent as the warm water filled the porcelain tub.

He laid her in once it was full and lightly bumped his forehead against the side of hers. He needed her. He needed her more than ever, but it would take a while before she returns back and he knew that.

Taking the loofah, he started rubbing the parts of her body that weren't soaked by the lavender bath then decided to sing softly to her.

 _"Now all the birds have fled, the hurt just leaves me scared_

 _Losing everything I've ever known  
It's all become too much, maybe I'm not built for love  
_

 _If I knew that I could reach you, I would go... "_

Bonnie sat there listening to his voice letting more tears fall then opened her mouth and her shaking voice joined him.

* * *

He watched her sleep looking as if she was faking it, but her heart told him that she wasn't. He hates himself for what he's done, and a part of him wanted to leave her since she deserved so much better than him. He wanted to leave her a note and sneak off tonight, find a cliff and slip off his ring as the sun started to shine.

He never thought that things would happen like this, if only he was strong enough, they would've still had their baby. Bonnie wouldn't have interfered and Damon wouldn't have kicked her on the stomach.

He starts to wonder if he had done that on purpose. He told him that he wanted Bonnie to suffer and what better way would that have been than taking away her child. Their child.

Stefan let's out a breath holding her closer and whispered an apology to her again closing his eyes for the rest of the night.

* * *

His eyes moved along her face as he moved her hair back with his hand repeatedly. Humming a steady tune as he did so smiling a little when a smile came to her face. He was glad that she wasn't upset with him like he's upset with himself, but her love and forgiveness made his anger disappear slowly each hour.

Her voice was a whisper, "I love you."

"I deserve nothing from you. Especially your love, but I have it and I never want to lose it. I love you so much, Bonnie. You are the love of my life, my soul, my everything. I love you, I love you."

She kisses him gently and he moves his hand to the side of her face kissing her deeper then pulled away meeting their foreheads.

"I'm sorry. Our baby, it's my fault."

"It just wasn't meant to be. When the right time comes, then we'll have our baby without complications. We won't have to worry about anyone or anything besides our baby."

"How did it happen?"

"I don't know. We'll figure it out though. We always do."

He kissed her once before pulling her close into his arms.

* * *

 **A/N: Let me know your thoughts!**


	9. Chapter 8

**-Stefan's POV-**

They have the definition of immortal wrong. Online, in the dictionary, it's all wrong and I should know because I am a vampire and I am dying. What the definition should say is that you can live forever, that is until your soulmate dies and then you slowly start to die yourself.

Bonnie Bennett was the love of my life, beautiful face, perfect body, contagious and adorable laugh. She was kind to everyone, willing to sacrifice herself for others, she was everything that every man in this world needed. And through it all, the one thing that still burns in my brain are her eyes.

Emerald with shining pieces of gold here and there if you look at them as deeply and as closely as I have over our many years together. She would hate it when I would look at her so closely, but I couldn't help myself, her beauty was beyond compare, those iris' were beyond compare, I will never find such a pair like hers.

 **:::**

I remember us dancing. We always used to dance, under the stars and moon on our back porch. We moved away from Miami to Atlanta and built a house together. I made sure that it looked and ways exactly how she wanted it to be. She would light candles along the railing and we danced to the soft music playing from the record player.

Old jazz was her favorite. I sometimes hated dancing to it because she would get so wrapped up in the music that she would shut her eyes and get lost in the saxophone and even then, there wasn't a sight that I would prefer seeing other than her.

 _"You are_ beautiful." I would pronounce every word, every day no matter the situation. If they were closed, her eyes would open and she look at me and smile so lovely. She's so lovely.

 **:::**

I remember our love, our sex, our passion. Multiple times a day if we wanted to. My hands could never part from her skin and her lips could never part from mine. It always left us breathless.

She would dance for me, tease me shaking those round hips of hers and never gave me permission to touch. I would lay flatly on the bed once the show was over and watch her climb on top of me and now was the time that I touch. Her eyes would shut as my hands ran up the back of her thighs, squeeze her ass, then push her down on me closer running my hands up her back. Five seconds, I would wait looking into her eyes before I meet our lips.

Control was never an option for either of us, we either were or wasn't. I would sit up and turn so that she's on her back and hiss when the heel of her stiletto would pierce the back of my calf muscle. She insisted on wearing heels most times and I think it was her way of stating that she's the boss.

I loved to take her slow every once in awhile just to savor the feel of her especially after a long day or in the morning. Bonnie loved it rough, she would fuck me good and hard and was always loud when we fucked. I swear if we didn't live in the woods that the our next door neighbors would get themselves off just on her sounds alone. She would collapse getting down from her high gripping on to the headboard as she caught her breath then lazily resting on me once I sat up. I would massage her back kissing her neck and if I didn't feed that day or haven't fed in a while, I would drink.

 **:::**

I remember our walks together in town or just in the woods. If we wanted to go into town, we would always look for children and babies that looked like us and think of a name and the type of attitude he or she would have. We wanted children but in the same instant we knew that we would be better if it was just the two of us. The incident made us come to realize that. We settled on our friends children, baby sitting whenever they needed some alone time, taking them out to eat or to the park or library once they grew older.

If we were in the woods, she would practice her magic. Make clear pathways for us to walk through, make the leaves nice and green in the Spring and summertime. I was always amazed at her talents, her ability to do the impossible by reciting Latin in her head or aloud but that resulted to nothing but us having sex on the ground.

 **:::**

I remember our fights. Sometimes it was serious, others it was over petty things, but we always yelled. We got in each other's faces, toe to toe and she would push me back but step up to me again. I hated fighting with her but sometimes we would just spend too much time together that we got on each others nerves, but that one fight that we had in the car changed our lives.

Bonnie was a jealous woman, and I am the one to blame. When we were younger, I was a horrible boyfriend to her, I would cheat and flirt with many women honestly not caring what Bonnie would think. I was horrible but she loved me anyway. Now women would talk to me and I would be polite and talk back but she hated it. I don't know what I said or did to get her so upset with me one time, but as soon as we left the restaurant and got in the car, she told me that she wanted to breakup. At first I shook it off and started to drive us home, but she kept going on about how I'm no different from my past self, that I'm playing her and her heart. Calmly, I explained to her that I was just being nice, but she didn't believe me, she kept yelling so I yelled back figuring that maybe she would only understand and listen to me that way.

The last word I called her was a bitch and she said my name then after that, it all went silent as I swerved and drove us into trees on the side of the road. I was pressing the gas petal hard without even realizing and to avoid hitting the car in front of me, I hit trees instead. I woke up to the sounds of sirens confused before I looked beside me and saw her bloody face resting on the dashboard. I've never cried so hard in my life. I wanted to touch her but I didn't want to break her and thank God the ambulance came and carefully strapped her down on a gurney. They wanted to check on me but I told them off and rode with Bonnie.

 _"Don't you die on me, don't you dare. I fucking love you, Bonnie, please."_

When we got to the hospital I stayed with her for as long as I could repeatedly telling her how much I loved her and kissing her then I had to wait.

Shortly came our friends asking me what happened but I couldn't talk. The only thing that was on my mind was that I may never be able to see her eyes again. And it was all my fault.

The second the doctor said that I could go in, I went in and stayed with her until she was able to leave. I didn't sleep or eat or do much of anything because I couldn't unless I knew for certain that she would be fine.

 **:::**

I remember lying with her all day and I'm sure that I annoyed her with all the apologizing that I've done. She told me that she forgave me, but I still wanted to remind her. Our love grew more than I thought it could. It was quiet even our talks were. I could now read her mind almost perfectly and she could do the same with me.

We didn't want any visitors, we had enough of that in the hospital and yes, it was selfish, but that's just the way that it was. We got married alone in our backyard and the reason we weren't before was because the only thoughts on our mind at the time was surviving.

She bought a dress, so simple yet with her in it, it looked as if it was made of diamonds. We said our vows, we danced, and had sex on the kitchen counter later that night.

 **:::**

I remember her aging. She was always so shy about it and I don't know what for she looked the same to me, she had such a youthful face.

I would grow depressed wishing that I was growing old right along with her and we'd be one of those old couples that are still so deeply in love that the young folk looked up to.

I took her to all the places she wanted to go, Niagara Falls, Pairs, Russia, Italy, Bolivia, Iceland. Anywhere. We never traveled, we were always private and reserved so it was all such an experience.

 **:::**

I remember her dying. Sunday at dusk looking into her eyes. We stayed up all night the following night because she said that it was her time to go. We talked and said our goodbyes. She told me to not end my life, to find another woman who made me happy and enjoy that and I promised her that I would. We shared one last kiss before she closed her eyes and an hour later, she breathed her last breath.

I held her and cried then called our family and friends to deliver them the news. The funeral was bigger than I thought since her parents planned it and it was truly beautiful but I honestly didn't want to be there. First to arrive, last to leave with the same thought running through my mind. I will never see those eyes again.

 **:::**

I remember when it all happened. Slowly, the green faded from my vision. The green trees were no longer green in my eyes, the pictures of my wife, her eyes were no longer that magnificent emerald. In the mirror my eyes were no longer green and that wasn't the only thing that started to change, I started fading. As if my life was linked to hers, as if our bond was so strong that I couldn't survive without her. I was dying but it was beautiful.

I would smile at my grey hairs, my wrinkling skin, how slowly I now moved. I no longer frowned at the colorless leaves and grass and or the light in which instructed me to GO. I should've known that this would happen because when we got in that accident, my wounds didn't heal as fast as they would've, but once Bonnie was back to health, all my scars, cuts, and bruises were gone.

 **:::**

I remember dying, calling my fellow vampire friend Jaden who had grown close to Bonnie and I and telling him goodbye. He came over and we drank beers and talked about the good old times before I asked him to leave at two in the morning.

I sat on her side of the bed, wrote all this down and now I will close my eyes to be with my soulmate. The love of my life. Bonnie Sheila Salvatore.

\- _SS_

* * *

 **A/N: Thank you all for reading and reviewing! I honestly didn't want to write an author's note, I wanted to end it like this, but I knew that I would get questions so for those who are wondering, yes, this is the end of I Need My Girl. I actually wrote this chapter as a one-shot, but I decided to conclude this fic with it just because I thought that it fit in perfectly with the story. I had to add and delete some parts just to make it link with previous chapters but hopefully it still does it justice. Until next time...**

 **XO**

 **Ashlyne**


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